[Aubrey’s not sure when she falls asleep, but she dreams, vaguely. No specific actions (or nightmares, for that matter), just… faces. Lost friends. People she never got to see enough.
[Eren might see them, too; last looks. Mari, gentle as always; Hero, Kel, Sunny, dark and broken; Basil, horrified; Basil, scared for his life; Basil, a horror himself—]
[She wakes abruptly, vision blurred by tears. Ah… it was bound to spill sooner or later.]
[Aubrey finds herself upright again, still on a couch, Eren still sleeping on her lap—breathing, warm. But someone else has joined them: Armin, upright but leaning and sleeping. The rest of Eren is on his lap, now.
[It’s a precious sight. Aubrey wishes desperately that she could take it in, notice nothing else, but she’d recognize the wallpaper in the periphery anywhere. She covers her mouth and chokes back something inhuman.]
[It’s his house, now. A quiet living room—and kitchen, and dining, and entry. Small place. Every detail is crystal clear; an overwhelming green tamed by the soft light of morning (or is it evening?), plants on the bookshelves, plants from the ceiling, on the tables, by the windows. All immaculately cared for, blooming and thriving—even as, outside, there’s a chill. It seeps through thin walls, a reminder that the house is not as cozy as it looks.
[He had lots of happy birthdays here, anyway. Right in the middle of Februrary.... The winds outside had nothing on them.]
[Aubrey could almost think she’s been tossed back for real, Eren and Armin with, but one detail is glaringly amiss: the television. Numbers roll like static; a familiar sight, albeit never before vertical. She’s not sure if it’s a mercy or a cruelty that a question won’t land yet. Maybe it’ll be a good distraction....]
[Armin wakes up only shortly after Aubrey does, startling himself into sitting upright. He doesn't recognize the room, nor does he remember falling asleep, Eren's legs across his lap. Looking down, he runs a gentle hand up and down his friend's leg as he yawns himself into full consciousness.
I’m fine. [Instinctive as it is patently false. At least Armin yawned, talked a little before he noticed; Aubrey can’t quite keep her face dry, nor can she look at him, but having someone here and awake… it’s almost grounding.]
[Her voice is pathetic again anyway.] My best friend lived here.
And died here.
[She forces a swallow.] I don’t… I don’t want to talk about it.
[She half expected him to ask. I don’t deserve y—]
Thanks.
[Aubrey wipes her eyes again, tries to keep her breath steady. She hates this place. She hates this place. But Armin’s smiling at her, and she can try to keep it together. For his sake.]
[Finally, she nods idly towards the TV. It was on that night; Aubrey was only half-watching as the hours droned on. But when the chatter went quiet, it was there to fill the gaps, stupid commercials and mind-numbing movies. Made it impossible to dwell on anything. Now, the static resolves into a number.]
[Insanity, she thinks, playing games here. Aubrey watches it desperately.]
Fifteen. “What’s your weirdest romantic experience?”
[Eren’s here, too, of course. She strokes his hair. It’s soothing.] I’m gonna add… this doesn’t count.
[Ah-- Armin gets to looking a little flustered at that, shifting where he sits, his cheeks pink. His hands are still resting on Eren's legs. Is this strange for Aubrey? It isn't lost on him that he and Eren were just recently kissing in the ocean. Aubrey hadn't seemed to mind then, but the circumstances were...a bit different.
[Still, how could anyone expect Armin to move backwards now? He loves Eren. He always will...]
Well, I...
Hm. The weirdest one...?
[Hey, Aubrey - does your boyfriend taking you to an alternate reality he created specifically for you, confessing all of his deepest sins, then promising to wait in Hell for you until you both die and can spend the rest of eternity together count?]
You know...It would be easy to come up with some story from when Eren and I were just kids - we got ourselves into trouble sometimes, sneaking around and things like that...
That wouldn't really be the truth, though. All things considered, I think...
[Well...]
This isn't the only...separate reality I've seen Eren in, I guess. But as far as romance goes, any variation would probably be the strangest thing you could experience.
[Bless Armin’s rambling. Aubrey’s not sure if he realizes how welcome his voice is, but she listens to him like a lifeline. She’s been too preoccupied to find this strange—to the point where, when he mentions Eren by name, it’s almost a surprise. Right…]
[At that last pause, she finally manages to turn Armin’s way. The fluster is very human. It’s nice… makes her want to smile.]
Separate… reality? [Why does that sound familiar…?]
[She’s not sure what he means about strange variations, but after some thought:] Oh, when we met… didn’t you say something about that? Eren… bringing you somewhere?
With the power of The Founding Titan, Eren's abilities were beyond anything that we could comprehend...
[It's strange to say it out loud, but...] Even back when I said that to you, I didn't realize...
He might as well have become his own god.
Back home, as long as you were an Eldian, Eren could bring you to any reality he wanted to.
Before...[Armin pauses, takes a look at Eren's face - ever the deep sleeper. He doesn't realize anything's amiss yet. He lowers his voice a fraction.] Before Eren died, I mean...we walked through our lives together. He told me everything - everything. It was in one of those...false realities.
[Without thinking about it, he lightly squeeze's Eren's knee.]
We promised to stay together once all was said and done. He said...he'd wait in Hell for me.
misread that as “rumble” and had a Moment… we love the rambles tho
[“He said he’d wait in Hell for me.” Aubrey’s expression tenses, slightly—not that she can fully relax here. She almost could, though, listening to him. Despite the subject. It makes sense of what Eren did for Mikasa, at least. What a way to say goodbye....]
And here we are… [There’s the faintest trace of a joke to it, but Aubrey doesn’t have the energy.]
[She’s been quiet as a matter of mood. But the way Armin looks at Eren…]
I should mention… he can hear us. [By now, Aubrey can say this somewhat nonchalantly. She rubs her thumb idly at Eren’s face, as if drying his cheeks.] It’s not a normal sleep… but I think he’s okay.
[Would it be reassuring or make it worse to talk more about what’s happened? The game rolls charisma on before Aubrey can make up her mind on it.]
A love letter…? [She smiles faintly, recalling.] I don’t know if it counts, but there was one year I found a little handmade heart in my locker that said “Be my Valentine, Sweetheart~”. [Her tone is not doing the glitter and drawn-on sparkles justice.]
Turned out my friend Mikhael [“It’s The Maverick now,” she can hear him protest] had just slipped hearts around for everyone, and he got mine confused with someone else’s...
[He’s a good kid.]
[The next question wipes that smile immediately.]
Seventy-four. “Have you ever broken someone else’s heart?”
Not necessarily - obvious, I mean. I know...[His attention is pulled back to Eren momentarily, expression soft with love as the back of his knuckles run up and down the man's shin.]
I know you love Eren. But...[He shrugs.] I have a preference for both, personally.
We get a couple of weird looks back home too - not a whole lot of marriages or anything like that - but people tend to mind their business.
[He could say that again. Thankfully, the memory of the titans is brief, not strong enough to be shared. Aubrey’s been more worried about other things, too.]
[She watches how Armin pets Eren, loving and soft. As ever, the simultaneous thoughts: that this “should” bother her, and yet that it doesn’t at all. Like how loving both “should” bother her, maybe. Stuff to mull over....]
[But for now, another number.]
Forty-one [and this feels invasive]: “Which physical traits do you find appealing?”
[It does feel invasive if only by virtue of Armin being a mature male with preferences and libido. His face turns pink almost instantly. He knows he won't be able to lie, but he can at least...word things delicately.]
Well, I...[Oh. He's nervous, actually. There's a brief laugh - also nervous.]
Height...in men. That's one. [Don't look at your 6' tall not-but-maybe-still-boyfriend as you say this.] Uhm. Size. [Clearing his throat!]
A nice jaw, I guess. Or, maybe...just a strong face? [Has his face ever been so warm?
[It's time to talk about the women, says the world. He really hopes he doesn't manage to offend Aubrey with this somehow...]
For women, there's...ah...
Well, softness. If that makes sense. [...] The natural presence of...curves and...things like that.
I can’t believe I get to use this icon, in this PSL,,
[If it’s any consolation to Armin, seeing his face go pink has Aubrey’s turning a similar shade. It’s an awkward question no matter what, but…
[…“Size”? Oh. Oh, haha, well, yeah, Aubrey’s not stupid, he doesn’t need to make this a thousand times worse talking around it like that and she would’ve interrupted him if she had the chance and hey hey Aubrey, hey, Aubrey, focus, most mortifying second of her life Eren’s eyes are up here—]
[Anyway! Her hands are on her face now. By the time Armin gets to women, that is, which is somehow very fast and yet not quick enough at all. What did he even say between then? At least she’s not being quizzed on it. Kill them now, actually.]
[When Armin’s finally done, she just. Cracks open a finger to peer sideways at him. Her face is very, very red.]
Hourglass figure. You can say it.
[Her tone is very flat, considering. Blunt. Not soft. She’s not stupid.]
[Well, specific people are one thing, but—
[Before Aubrey can dreg up some argument (for banter’s sake more than anything), the world has other ideas.]
Hey, Armin, before anything else?
Kill me.
[It’s… only fair....]
I find… Eren appealing.... [Copout.] You know, the face. He’s strong. I’ve seen his abs. [Okay,,] I like his eyes. His hair. [Flicking at those strands, with the hand that’s not still hiding her face on Armin’s side.] He’s— I mean. You know. He’s hot. 10 out of 10.
So. Yeah. Uh. Strong, and—
[Is she done yet? No, the world says, because this is quite possibly the worst way ever to nudge a bisexual awakening.]
—I mean, I’m not— judging your preferences, or anything, but—
[Fuck. Fuck! Just spit it out!]
I like a guy who can pick me up and I think if I could pick up a girl that’d be kinda cool. Okay? [She claps her hands abruptly and keeps them clasped.] There! Final answer.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
here comes the pain train
[Aubrey’s not sure when she falls asleep, but she dreams, vaguely. No specific actions (or nightmares, for that matter), just… faces. Lost friends. People she never got to see enough.
[Eren might see them, too; last looks. Mari, gentle as always; Hero, Kel, Sunny, dark and broken; Basil, horrified; Basil, scared for his life; Basil, a horror himself—]
[She wakes abruptly, vision blurred by tears. Ah… it was bound to spill sooner or later.]
[Aubrey finds herself upright again, still on a couch, Eren still sleeping on her lap—breathing, warm. But someone else has joined them: Armin, upright but leaning and sleeping. The rest of Eren is on his lap, now.
[It’s a precious sight. Aubrey wishes desperately that she could take it in, notice nothing else, but she’d recognize the wallpaper in the periphery anywhere. She covers her mouth and chokes back something inhuman.]
[It’s his house, now. A quiet living room—and kitchen, and dining, and entry. Small place. Every detail is crystal clear; an overwhelming green tamed by the soft light of morning (or is it evening?), plants on the bookshelves, plants from the ceiling, on the tables, by the windows. All immaculately cared for, blooming and thriving—even as, outside, there’s a chill. It seeps through thin walls, a reminder that the house is not as cozy as it looks.
[He had lots of happy birthdays here, anyway. Right in the middle of Februrary.... The winds outside had nothing on them.]
[Aubrey could almost think she’s been tossed back for real, Eren and Armin with, but one detail is glaringly amiss: the television. Numbers roll like static; a familiar sight, albeit never before vertical. She’s not sure if it’s a mercy or a cruelty that a question won’t land yet. Maybe it’ll be a good distraction....]
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[He turns to Aubrey with a sleepy smile.]
Hi...
Sorry, I...don't remember falling asleep--
[Oh. She looks upset.]
Are you okay?
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I’m fine. [Instinctive as it is patently false. At least Armin yawned, talked a little before he noticed; Aubrey can’t quite keep her face dry, nor can she look at him, but having someone here and awake… it’s almost grounding.]
[Her voice is pathetic again anyway.] My best friend lived here.
And died here.
[She forces a swallow.] I don’t… I don’t want to talk about it.
[It was my fault.]
when he wears a little hat
[He and Aubrey might...understand each other a little better than he originally thought...
[Armin's good at manufacturing smiles. He paints one on that's equal parts understanding and obliging.]
Let's not talk about it then. That's alright.
the hat 🥺
[She half expected him to ask. I don’t deserve y—]
Thanks.
[Aubrey wipes her eyes again, tries to keep her breath steady. She hates this place. She hates this place. But Armin’s smiling at her, and she can try to keep it together. For his sake.]
[Finally, she nods idly towards the TV. It was on that night; Aubrey was only half-watching as the hours droned on. But when the chatter went quiet, it was there to fill the gaps, stupid commercials and mind-numbing movies. Made it impossible to dwell on anything. Now, the static resolves into a number.]
[Insanity, she thinks, playing games here. Aubrey watches it desperately.]
Fifteen. “What’s your weirdest romantic experience?”
[Eren’s here, too, of course. She strokes his hair. It’s soothing.] I’m gonna add… this doesn’t count.
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[Still, how could anyone expect Armin to move backwards now? He loves Eren. He always will...]
Well, I...
Hm. The weirdest one...?
[Hey, Aubrey - does your boyfriend taking you to an alternate reality he created specifically for you, confessing all of his deepest sins, then promising to wait in Hell for you until you both die and can spend the rest of eternity together count?]
You know...It would be easy to come up with some story from when Eren and I were just kids - we got ourselves into trouble sometimes, sneaking around and things like that...
That wouldn't really be the truth, though. All things considered, I think...
[Well...]
This isn't the only...separate reality I've seen Eren in, I guess. But as far as romance goes, any variation would probably be the strangest thing you could experience.
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[Bless Armin’s rambling. Aubrey’s not sure if he realizes how welcome his voice is, but she listens to him like a lifeline. She’s been too preoccupied to find this strange—to the point where, when he mentions Eren by name, it’s almost a surprise. Right…]
[At that last pause, she finally manages to turn Armin’s way. The fluster is very human. It’s nice… makes her want to smile.]
Separate… reality? [Why does that sound familiar…?]
[She’s not sure what he means about strange variations, but after some thought:] Oh, when we met… didn’t you say something about that? Eren… bringing you somewhere?
boy but he can ramble
That's right. I guess I did say that...
With the power of The Founding Titan, Eren's abilities were beyond anything that we could comprehend...
[It's strange to say it out loud, but...] Even back when I said that to you, I didn't realize...
He might as well have become his own god.
Back home, as long as you were an Eldian, Eren could bring you to any reality he wanted to.
Before...[Armin pauses, takes a look at Eren's face - ever the deep sleeper. He doesn't realize anything's amiss yet. He lowers his voice a fraction.] Before Eren died, I mean...we walked through our lives together. He told me everything - everything. It was in one of those...false realities.
[Without thinking about it, he lightly squeeze's Eren's knee.]
We promised to stay together once all was said and done. He said...he'd wait in Hell for me.
misread that as “rumble” and had a Moment… we love the rambles tho
[“He said he’d wait in Hell for me.” Aubrey’s expression tenses, slightly—not that she can fully relax here. She almost could, though, listening to him. Despite the subject. It makes sense of what Eren did for Mikasa, at least. What a way to say goodbye....]
And here we are… [There’s the faintest trace of a joke to it, but Aubrey doesn’t have the energy.]
[She’s been quiet as a matter of mood. But the way Armin looks at Eren…]
I should mention… he can hear us. [By now, Aubrey can say this somewhat nonchalantly. She rubs her thumb idly at Eren’s face, as if drying his cheeks.] It’s not a normal sleep… but I think he’s okay.
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How do you mean?
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[Slow breath in. It hasn’t been that long, since the dance—yet Armin’s missed so much.]
He won’t wake up.
But I know he’s listening. [She gives his hand a squeeze.] He responds, sometimes.
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Eren...
[He's not...ready to lose him again.
[The numbers roll. Armin's eyes move toward them without his permission. It's his turn...]
Twenty-four. [He doesn't sound quite pleased that he's being forced to focus on something other than his half-dead friend...]
Have you ever received a love letter?
slams headcanon button
[Would it be reassuring or make it worse to talk more about what’s happened? The game rolls
charismaon before Aubrey can make up her mind on it.]A love letter…? [She smiles faintly, recalling.] I don’t know if it counts, but there was one year I found a little handmade heart in my locker that said “Be my Valentine, Sweetheart~”. [Her tone is not doing the glitter and drawn-on sparkles justice.]
Turned out my friend Mikhael [“It’s The Maverick now,” she can hear him protest] had just slipped hearts around for everyone, and he got mine confused with someone else’s...
[He’s a good kid.]
[The next question wipes that smile immediately.]
Seventy-four. “Have you ever broken someone else’s heart?”
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Me? No. At least...I can't see how I would have. I'm no heartbreaker myself.
["Just heartbroken."
[Maybe he should move on quickly too...]
Thirty-eight. Oh-- [At this, an apologetic look; not really a polite question to ask.] Do you...prefer men or women?
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[The laugh catches her off-guard—but, ah, there’s the kicker. She certainly can’t fault him for moving on quickly; she knows the story, anyway....]
[At the question, Aubrey looks… perplexed. Both at the question itself, and Armin’s own expression.]
I mean… [Quick glance down to her lap.] …isn’t it obvious? [Then again, maybe not....]
Our world’s not— I mean, people who like both exist, I guess. But it’s not too accepted, where I’m from. You’d get weird looks.
[Nothing about the way she sputters through this implies it’s a bias she shares. It’s all… very confusing. And besides the point now, anyway.]
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I know you love Eren. But...[He shrugs.] I have a preference for both, personally.
We get a couple of weird looks back home too - not a whole lot of marriages or anything like that - but people tend to mind their business.
More pressing things to worry about, I guess.
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[He could say that again. Thankfully, the memory of the titans is brief, not strong enough to be shared. Aubrey’s been more worried about other things, too.]
[She watches how Armin pets Eren, loving and soft. As ever, the simultaneous thoughts: that this “should” bother her, and yet that it doesn’t at all. Like how loving both “should” bother her, maybe. Stuff to mull over....]
[But for now, another number.]
Forty-one [and this feels invasive]: “Which physical traits do you find appealing?”
gag tag #1
moving on
Well, I...[Oh. He's nervous, actually. There's a brief laugh - also nervous.]
Height...in men. That's one. [Don't look at your 6' tall not-but-maybe-still-boyfriend as you say this.] Uhm. Size. [Clearing his throat!]
A nice jaw, I guess. Or, maybe...just a strong face? [Has his face ever been so warm?
[It's time to talk about the women, says the world. He really hopes he doesn't manage to offend Aubrey with this somehow...]
For women, there's...ah...
Well, softness. If that makes sense. [...] The natural presence of...curves and...things like that.
I can’t believe I get to use this icon, in this PSL,,
[If it’s any consolation to Armin, seeing his face go pink has Aubrey’s turning a similar shade. It’s an awkward question no matter what, but…
[…“Size”? Oh. Oh, haha, well, yeah, Aubrey’s not stupid, he doesn’t need to make this a thousand times worse talking around it like that and she would’ve interrupted him if she had the chance and hey hey Aubrey, hey, Aubrey, focus, most mortifying second of her life Eren’s eyes are up here—]
[Anyway! Her hands are on her face now. By the time Armin gets to women, that is, which is somehow very fast and yet not quick enough at all. What did he even say between then? At least she’s not being quizzed on it. Kill them now, actually.]
[When Armin’s finally done, she just. Cracks open a finger to peer sideways at him. Her face is very, very red.]
Hourglass figure. You can say it.
[Her tone is very flat, considering. Blunt. Not soft. She’s not stupid.]
Big tits and ass. Guys like that. I get it.
[Kill them now, actually!]
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I would never say that! Use those words--
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What, use them sparingly?
[She laughs, half snickering half dying. Well, mostly dying, but today she learned Armin’s a prude (verbally, at least), and that’s funny.]
Eren agrees. [Aubrey is so fucking glad his eyes are closed.] You can use the bad words.
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It's...disrespectful. Isn't it?
[Please roll a different number, please roll a different number--
[The screen rolls. It lands back on forty-one.]
Same question. [It's nearly a groan.]
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[Well, specific people are one thing, but—
[Before Aubrey can dreg up some argument (for banter’s sake more than anything), the world has other ideas.]
Hey, Armin, before anything else?
Kill me.
[It’s… only fair....]
I find… Eren appealing.... [Copout.] You know, the face. He’s strong. I’ve seen his abs. [Okay,,] I like his eyes. His hair. [Flicking at those strands, with the hand that’s not still hiding her face on Armin’s side.] He’s— I mean. You know. He’s hot. 10 out of 10.
So. Yeah. Uh. Strong, and—
[Is she done yet? No, the world says, because this is quite possibly the worst way ever to nudge a bisexual awakening.]
—I mean, I’m not— judging your preferences, or anything, but—
[Fuck. Fuck! Just spit it out!]
I like a guy who can pick me up and I think if I could pick up a girl that’d be kinda cool. Okay? [She claps her hands abruptly and keeps them clasped.] There! Final answer.
I had to fucking use this icon
beautiful!
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kept the question bc it's funny to me
poor Armin
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I'm running with this
RUN BOY RUN
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back in the “i have no fucking icons for this” trenches lads
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2/3 I lied
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